Performance review mistakes and how to avoid them 

Estimated reading time: 5 minutes

Honest, clear performance reviews drive growth – here’s how managers can do them right.

Most managers think they’re giving helpful performance feedback. Most employees disagree. How can managers focus on delivering valuable written and verbal reviews? Less vague language, forced positivity, and conversations that feel more like lectures than discussions are a good start.  

Preparing the written feedback

Writing a performance review requires that you carefully evaluate each employee against the expectations of their role, taking into account your own observations and peer feedback. That written review serves as an opportunity to ensure that both you and the employee are incredibly clear and aligned on what’s going well and where improvement may be needed. Here’s where I see managers go wrong in this process.

Avoid jargon soup

As a director, I tend to hear about the performance cases my engineering managers are dealing with on their teams before the formal review process. In our 1:1s, they’ll describe with brevity and accuracy how they believe their reports could strengthen their impact. But when it comes to the written review, the summary of the same report’s opportunities for improvement suddenly becomes lengthy, unclear, and jargon-filled.

It’s critical that managers pull in language from career ladders and job expectations, but that shouldn’t come at the cost of sharing your valuable insights on how your report can improve. Speak plainly. Imagine that your report will only retain one sentence from your written feedback – what should it be? Distill the feedback and the key takeaway into a single, clear statement.

Instead of: “Opportunities exist to further align cross-functional collaboration with the broader strategic initiatives, ensuring stakeholder engagement.”

Try: “Improve cross-functional collaboration by engaging stakeholders earlier and more frequently in your process.”

Don’t sacrifice accuracy for balance 

When it comes time for me to review engineering managers’ appraisals of their reports, my most common question is, “But…how is this person actually doing?” In the well-intentioned spirit of trying to balance positive and opportunity-based feedback, the overall narrative of someone’s year can get lost.

The focus should be on accuracy and presenting facts impartially. If someone is excelling in their role and their opportunities for improvement are minor or optional enhancements, say that. If someone is not yet meeting expectations overall but is really strong in one area, say that. When reports know where they stand, it’s clear what they need to do next. 

Having the performance review conversation

Discussing the written review with an employee after they’ve had the opportunity to look over it can feel uncomfortable. Even the most experienced managers consider it one of the toughest parts of their job. Here are a few tips to help you prepare for that conversation.

Do not make it about yourself

It’s normal to feel nervous before a performance conversation – everyone does. And it’s important to remember that anxiety is rooted in the “I.” I’m anxious about this conversation. I’m stressed I won’t say everything right. I’m worried about how they’ll feel. I’m concerned this will impact our relationship. I’m nervous about how they’ll react.

When you start to feel nervous and your mind starts to race, remember that this conversation is about them. You are here to support them in their growth. Shifting your mindset from I to them allows you to be more present, thoughtful, and constructive.

Instead of worrying about how you’ll do in the conversation, focus on making it meaningful and useful for your report. Consider asking each employee to share their goals for the discussion ahead of time so that you can design a conversational structure that takes both your and their aspirations into account. Prepare questions to guide the discussion and to check for understanding of the written review, ensuring they leave extremely clear on both their achievements and the challenges.

Take the time to actually have a discussion 

The most common mistake I see managers make in performance conversations – especially when there are performance concerns at play – is a focus on delivering feedback rather than facilitating understanding. They treat it as a one-way transmission rather than a collaborative discussion.

Think of this conversation as you would any other learning opportunity. If you were teaching your report a new skill, you wouldn’t monologue at them for an hour and expect them to comprehend everything. You’d encourage questions, explore concepts together, and adjust your approach based on their responses. Performance conversations should be no different.

Don’t:

• Walk into the conversation with a script and read through feedback verbatim
• Focus on saying everything you planned instead of checking that your report understands
• Assume silence means agreement or understanding

Instead, try:

• Encouraging dialogue by asking open-ended questions like, “How does this feedback land with you?”
• Checking for understanding throughout the conversation
• Creating space for exploration and scheduling more time if needed

Approaching performance review conversations with curiosity and collaboration not only improves the likelihood that your report will internalize the feedback but also strengthens trust and alignment between you both.

After the performance review

Performance review season is a busy time for managers, often requiring long hours to get everything done. It’s natural to want a break once reviews are completed, but now is the best time to set yourself up for ongoing performance conversations that will make next year’s review writing a breeze. While feedback is fresh, make it visible to your report – like the top of a shared 1:1 agenda. This keeps expectations front and center, making it easier to track progress and have consistent, meaningful conversations about where your reports are at.

Performance review season is crucial, but feedback shouldn’t be confined to an annual process. When managers build strong feedback habits throughout the year, performance conversations become far more effective and far less daunting. Start today and remember that each conversation is an opportunity to hone your skills.

Final thoughts

Preparing and delivering feedback is a fundamental skill for managers, but it’s one that requires thoughtfulness and intentionality. Avoiding jargon, prioritizing accuracy over balance, shifting focus away from yourself, and ensuring conversations are truly two-way discussions will lead to better outcomes for your reports and, ultimately, for your team as a whole.

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