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Pleasing everyone, except yourself: Overcoming people-pleasing tendencies to become a stronger engineering leader

Nikita Rathi talks about her ongoing journey towards recognising the different patterns of people pleasing that she tends to fall into, like countless other folks, and how it impacts her work as an engineering leader.

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August 30, 2023

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As a South-Asian woman, I was conditioned from a young age to prioritise the needs of others over my own, limit my self-expression, take up as little space as possible, and be adaptable, even at the cost of my own personal and professional growth. This talk is about my ongoing journey towards recognising the different patterns of people pleasing that I tend to fall into, like countless other folks, and how this impacts my work as an engineering leader.

Most importantly, I’ll share strategies and learnings on how to break free from the people-pleasing trap, while still being an effective, empathetic and authentic leader. Whether you’re a seasoned professional or just starting out in your career, I hope you’ll leave this talk having had some ‘aha’ moments of your own tendencies, and a deeper understanding of how people-pleasing can hold you back and how you can overcome them.